All I’ve got to do is pass as an ordinary human being. Simple. What could possibly go wrong?

Did I mention we have comfy chairs? Did I mention we have comfy chairs? It's art! A statement on modern society, 'Oh Ain't Modern Society Awful?'! I'm the Doctor. Well, they call me the Doctor. I don't know why. I call me the Doctor too. I still don't know why. Sorry, checking all the water…

Cupiditate non provident, similique sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollitia.

Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco. Nisi ut aliquid ex ea commodi consequatur? Quis autem vel eum iure reprehenderit qui in ea voluptate velit esse quam. Nam libero tempore, cum soluta nobis est eligendi optio cumque nihil impedit quo minus id quod maxime placeat. Ut enim ad minima veniam, quis nostrum exercitationem…

I hear the jury’s still out on science.

I've opened a door here that I regret. Well, what do you expect, mother? I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it. Across from where? There's only one man I've ever called a coward, and that's Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I'm calling you is a television actor. He'll want to use…

Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast.

It's a hug, Michael. I'm hugging you. Say goodbye to these, because it's the last time! It's called 'taking advantage.' It's what gets you ahead in life. Army had half a day. Not tricks, Michael, illusions. Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. We just call it a sausage. Now, when you…

The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.…hey.…the good things don’t always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.

I'm the Doctor, I'm worse than everyone's aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I'm introducing myself. You've swallowed a planet! They're not aliens, they're Earth…liens! Saving the world with meals on wheels. No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the…